MOM'S FAMILY     every one on this side is extremely poor, to the extent they don't have food to eat some nights. the fact that they all live in a very corrupted country doesnt help either. one of my aunts has an extremely depressed husband, who cheats on her. she's tried to leave him but he stabbed himself in the stomac because of her. that didn't sit well with their 3 kids. the eldest, a girl, went heavily into drugs and partying, the middle child, a 15 year old girl, started being extremely sexually active with much older men and became suicidal, and the youngest, a boy, became extremely agressive towards every one around him. they all fight constantly with each other. my other aunt has a very violent son that got into trouble with the son of the cheif of police. because of that he was framed for carrying drugs and put in jail for 3 years. her husband is an alcoholic and abuses her, and her other son ran away with his girlfriend a couple years ago. her daughter is now over weight. my grand mother  just died from a nasty, messy, bloody fall. her head opened all over the floor, in front of the sweetest, kindest man in the world, her adoring husband, my grandfather. it was traumatising for him and he is very depressed. unfortunatly shortly after her death, a man called and faked a kidnapping to try to scam him, more traumatising. my uncle is not my uncle anymore. he is only some pot head that tried to rape me last time i visited my family in mexico (they do not live in a nice area)    DAD'S FAMILY     from what i heard, my father's father was a criminal. he stole cars and robbed stores. he also left my father before he was 6 months old. him and his older sister lived with there single mother in the projects. they almost never had food and when they did it was shit. my father was pittied by the other parents and fed by them as well. the little money his mother had she spent on herself. she would leave for days, leaving them alone, only to have sex with men she just met, in hotel rooms. she brought men home, and almost every one of them abused my father or tried to rape his sister. his mother always put him down and told him he was just like his bastard father. on top of all that she beat him, almost each day. he tried to run away, it didint really work out.    after 2 months of knowing each other, they got married. smart move, douche bags.   MY FAMILY    with that beautiful combo, how could anything possibly go wrong? well, heres what did:   my parents have been separating, on and off, many times since i was born. my dad used to hit me. my mom used to cry for hours. my dad (my hero) has told me he hates me, to go fuck myself, to shut my fucking face, to get out of his fucking face and that he doesint even know if im his child, several times. he also mentioned that i was the soul cause of their seperations. the last time they seperated my dad almost died, he was so depressed he wouldint eat. at that time he was almost homeless, and lived in the worst possible neighbourhood, complete with tons of crazy drug addicted men and prostitutes.  before my mom took us and left the last time, we went to a safe house, my dad called the police and told them she had kidnapped me and my sister. we were violently taken away from our mother and questioned.  all of this made me suicidle, made me try drugs for a while, made me depressed, and made me so much stronger than what i could have been.     were all together now, and somehow i think forgiving them after all that has made us closer and happier.     im 13 and proud to say im much more mature than most my age, stronger too. (maybe a little smarter,also:) )       what doesnt kill you makes you stronger <3 

6 responses to my family is fucked up, sometimes i just need to think about it.

  1. Wow. I'm so sorry that a 13 yr. old is having to go through all this, or even KNOW all of this. Your father had no right to say those things to you, or to hit you. Just know that your parents are just fucked up children themselves. Their parents fucked them up and you can't allow yourself to become one of them. Move out as soon as you're 18 and get the best possible education you can get. It's the only way to spare your future children the same pain.
  2. Fuck-- my family is pretty much the same apart from the dad thing i dont talk to my Dad and i have two abusive druggie uncles instead :( its a shit life really :\
  3. Al stewart year of the cat, godd tune. Practice navigating between emotional  detachment and genuine emotion. This is the secret to life. 40per cent anyway.
  4. Good Lord. Sometimes a person wonders why "family" exists at all. Remember this, and this is not bs - your family does not make you who you are. They give you genes, and sometimes they give you strength, but they never give you identity. Look at how unhappy the richest of kids are. What makes a person strong, truly strong, is that person's decision to stand on top of all the crap life has heaped on them; rather than trying to swim through it. it's not easy, and you have a harder life journey than is fair to anyone, but if you ever achieve greatness, it will be because you were able to say, "that happened to me, and it didn't beat me. whatever you have...it's nothing."
  5. i know how u feel man man my moms side is poor too from a poor country and my dads side weelll none of them want to talk to us and my mom and and dad have been swearing and even in public theyve been fighting they also swear at us my das been using the word fuck almost everyday so im happy for you and feel like suicide too but thats life and life goes like that this world aint like you imagined it would be