Posted on September 07, 2008 at 10:52 PM (PDT)
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section: advice / life
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Everything I'm about to say comes from what I was told growing up, since it happened before my time. My sister was born before me in 1978. I've seen pictures of my mother when she was pregnant with her, and also pictures of her dispair and pain after my sister supposedly died. She supposedly had a birth defect that took her life at only 90 minutes old. She was born by c-section, and my parents never saw her with their own eyes. They heard the cries though. My parents were told she had died, and funeral arrangements were made. There was a closed casket memorial service, with a closed casket funeral. It was a suggested closed casket by the dr. because this supposed birth defect caused her to be born with no brain and missing half her skull, a real condition called Anencephaly. Yes, it's a real defect. Huh, if there's no brain, wouldn't she have been stillborn, and not been able to live a whole 1 1/2 hours? Anyway, no one except the dr. saw my sister. I have seen her true legit birth certificate with our official state seal and original issue number, however I never recall seeing a death certificate. I started doing research on vital records, first searching for records of people I know have passed on. All of those searches came back with results I know are true, including the ages and years of death with full names. Then, I searched my sisters name. No death certificate even exists. So what are the chances that my sister(or possibly even brother) was a blackmarket baby and stolen from my parents? I say maybe brother, because it wouldn't surprise me that the dr. would tell my parents they're having a girl, to get away with selling a boy. That way if my parents ever had the thought their daughter was still alive, they'd search for a girl and get nowhere since they had a son instead.
I also say this because I met a guy several years ago. I've been to his house on numerous occasions and was floored when I saw a picture on their wall. It was a pic of him at 4 years old, and that pic looked just like me. We could've been twins at that age. Even now, we share some resemblence. His birthday is only 4 days after my sisters, and they were born in the same hospital, only 1 door down from each other. So basically, could this be my brother? Is it possible that the dr. took my brother/sister from my parents and sold or even just gave him/her to the expectant receiving parent only 4 days later?
We've been putting flowers on what I believe now is an empty grave for 30 years. Yeah, I think the dr. suggested a closed casket not for deformity, but because there was nothing there to look at. OMG, where do I go from here? I really don't want to exhume the grave and disturb the ones around it. I will let those souls rest in peace. Do I tell this man "Hey, I think you're my brother. We need a DNA test."? How would he react to that? I really don't know what to do about this, and it's been rackin' my brain for 9 years, since I put 2 and 2 together.
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7 responses to Is my sister alive?
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 08, 2008 at 01:11 AM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
I don't know much about biology, but I don't think a baby without a brain could cry. If your parents' testimony is accurate, somebody was bullshitting someone else at some point in this story.
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 08, 2008 at 02:38 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
if what say is really what you believe then just out right tell the guy what you think .... if you're wrong you're wrong, but omg if you're right.......
even if he isnt your brother still search for your sister.... try myspace and things like that... you'd be suprised who's on there.....
good luck... this story really touched my heart!!! :)
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 08, 2008 at 08:22 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
You're right. If he's really my brother, I'd love to know for sure. If he's not, then atleast I know I tried. It's still uncanny the eerie coincidences between my sister and this guy(yeah, that sounds weird!). I've already tried Myspace, and gotten nowhere. I know that whoever has my brother/sister, they've changed his/her name from what I've grown up knowing. I've come to nothing but dead ends everywhere searching by her birth given name. The only thing I know for sure is that a birth certificate exists, while the death certificate doesn't. I also know that "mysteriously", the maternity ward of that hospital burned down the following year, and all records were lost, so I can't go that route either. Thank you for your wishes in my quest to find my sibling. God bless you.
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 08, 2008 at 11:40 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
i would ask your parents if they have any more medical information about the birth and the baby. Or do some research about the hospital or the doctor at that time... Seems to me that there are some holes in that story of your sister's birth. it sounds like something doesn't add up... good luck with everything.
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 13, 2008 at 07:16 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
Sadly, both of my parents have passed on to a better place. I never got the chance to tell them my thoughts in this matter.
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 09, 2008 at 12:42 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
I work in healthcare, and I have to say that it wouldn't surprise me. We see so much crazy stuff happen, lawsuits, fraud, all kinds of stuff. The only thing that I think is not listed here as a possibility is that your parents could have put the baby up for adoption and spun the whole thing to you. If they did do this, their sadness may have been quite real, and it might have been an option they were forced to take. Since this is the case, if you do approach this, do so with a certain level of respect and caution, but as the sis, your curiousity would be justified.
RE: Is my sister alive?
Posted on September 13, 2008 at 07:23 PM (PDT) ( ago )wrote the following:
My parents took great pride in their responsibilities as parents. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt they did not give up my sibling for adoption. When she/he was born, they had their own house, were financially stable, and awaited the birth anxiously. I can understand how you would come to that theory though, since adoption is common place now, and even more so 30 years ago. My mother and I had a very open relationship and could tell each other anything. I know that if by some miniscule chance that did happen, she would've revealed it to me on her death bed, and surely wouldn't have taken something of this magnitude to the grave. Thank you for your input. It is greatly appreciated, and still something to think about.