girlfriends gunna kill me :\

well i'm a lesbian. my girlfriend is hard to handle.. in the past i did mess things up lie to her about big and little things. she forgot nothing she gave me another chance. now shes holding all the things i did in thepast over my head. in all honesty i am trying my hardest withher this time. shes the only one. i try to show her shes the only one and i love her. .. i had a break down and realized alot about my life. im trying to change but at the same time im emotionally unstable right now. very depressed and i dont like myself... she was making me feel better. making me feel ok about how i look and she was making me feel like a good person. but now shes throwing everything from the pasti n my face saying she dosnt trust me and she never will.. i would do anything for her including moving to another state so she can be with family without worrying about what im doing back home. i spend all my spare time with her. id do anything for her.. i do anything for her. anything she wants i give it to her. everything is different this time. i love her and i want things to work out but i cant stand when i say i love you she calls me a lier. i didnt do anything to deserve that. exept in the past.. that was over 4 months ago. then we got back together amonth ago. im no leaving her ill stick this out with her untill she does trust me. it just hurts you know? im trying so hardand she dosn't want to give me any credit. i feel like its a hopless fight but i love her. i can't let her go.