It's just like...ugh. I don't love him. I'm in love with the idea of him. Like...he's really a total stranger, but I'm just so attracted to him I imagine what it would be like to talk with him, sit with him, listen to him...but that's not him. I don't know who he is. I want to know, but I'm too timid to ask-not because I'm afraid of what I'll find, but because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me. I want to talk to him in the worst way...but I'm too stupid to try and even stupider to be letting this get to me.